Silent Arguments – Quiet is Not the Same as Peace
Silence is golden, so shut up and get rich! My geography teacher used to say this to the class all the time. But there is no wealth in the silent treatment, silent brooding, or the silence that occurs when people stop speaking to each other. We need to keep in mind that quiet is not the same as peace. If we avoid dealing with problems, sharing our concerns,talking about what hurts us, and learning about the people in our lives, we are just engaging in silent arguments. Feeling sad, angry, and frustrated about the problems in our lives but not making any effort to actually address them. A household that does not have any disagreements or arguments is a household that is not actually communicating.
To be happy in relationships, we need to solve problems that occur between people. The only way that we can solve problems is to actively discuss the problems and try to find solutions. Otherwise, you are ignoring the problem and allowing those emotions to remain, affecting the people involved. In order to have healthy relationships, people need to understand that communication is essential.
Disagreements are going to happen in relationships. How you manage those disagreements is going to determine the level of intimacy in your relationship. When you avoid discussing problems for fear of an argument, you actually block you partners ability to learn about you and to show concern for issues in the relationship. The issues that are not discussed cause the partner who is upset to react poorly in other situations and then the arguments still occur. Here is a book that helps you transition from arguing to communicating and explaining your side of the situation:Canada: http://amzn.to/2ASTfKHUnited Kingdom: http://amzn.to/2B6bjS4You can find Violet here: www.violetreveira.comAll product links are amazon affiliate links. Thanks for watching Violet's Practical Help.
Posted by Violet Reveira, Psychologist on Saturday, December 9, 2017